I am off and reading a new book. Tosca Lee, Iscariot. One of my favorite authors of all time simply
because (as all my favorites do) she has the ability to make me stop and
rethink how I view the world and my place in it. I am still in the infant stages of the book,
so I’ll let you know later how it challenges me in future, but, having just
finished Ted Dekker’s Outlaw & Eyes Wide Open series I am acutely aware that my
spiritual being is nowhere near the
level to which I aspire. I’m talking
about truly allowing this “beautiful façade*” to fall away completely; to come
to the place where I understand with my entire being that this “costume”, this body,
is merely ”just some sand*”. This
physical body, though I strive to take care of it so that I might be able to do
that which I am called to do, is nothing to be revered or conversely, to be
shamed. I am who I was created to be. I see the world through the eyes of an oft
broken and rebuilt soul instead of the perfect eyes of my Savior. I meet every experience with bias and judgments
left behind as residue from the previous experience. I am a soul in constant flux. Always rewriting, challenging, building,
destroying…I am, in a word, human. But
am I? I often don’t feel as though I understand
the rules here. I still have a hard time
understanding malice and hate even after 40 years on this planet. Maybe I am just naïve. Maybe I am just my Father’s child. Many days I still feel like a babe barely able
to walk on my own. I’ll keep searching
and asking questions. I’ll be sure to
let you know if I ever come up with the answers. ;)
*for those who don’t know of my earlier work in Gospel – “Beautiful
Façade” and “I won’t be here” (just some sand) are earlier works. You can grab a listen here. http://www.indieheaven.com/artist_main.php?id=39567
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